Why Perth’s Best Bars Deserve a Standing Ovation (and a Second Drink)
Let’s face it: Life is hard, the Wi-Fi is spotty, and your ex still follows you on Instagram. But fear not, my friends—Perth’s bar scene is here to save your soul (and your credit card). Whether you’re a local legend or a tourist with a compass broken by the sun, these bars will make you feel like you’ve finally found your tribe. Plus, who doesn’t love a good story about how they accidentally ordered a $50 gin cocktail and still managed to flirt with the bartender? Let’s dive in.
The Drunken Duck: Where ‘Duck’ Is a Metaphor for Survival Skills
Nestled in the heart of Perth City, The Drunken Duck is the kind of bar that makes you question your life choices—and then orders another round to forget you asked. This place has a vibe that screams, “I survived the 2008 financial crisis, and I’m still paying for it,” but the drinks are so good you’ll forgive its midlife crisis.
- Why Go? The Duck’s “Mystery Shot Special” is a local legend. It changes daily, but the bartender will tell you it’s “stronger than your ex’s Instagram captions.”
- Bar Tip: Ask for the “Make Your Own Beer” flight. It’s like Tinder but for IPAs—swipe left on the sour, swipe right on the hazy.
More on crafting your own beer.
The Salty Seagull: Because Your Ex Is Still Single
If The Drunken Duck is your awkward uncle at a family reunion, The Salty Seagull is the cool cousin who brings a suitcase of rare whiskies and a questionable life story. Located on the corner of George and Hay (if you can find it—the GPS says “error: existential crisis”), this bar is a time capsule of 90s rock and 2023-level overconfidence.
- Must-Try: The “Seagull’s Revenge,” a cocktail so potent it’s rumored to have single-handedly caused a divorce in 2019.
- Bar Tip: Mention custom beer to the bartender. They’ll either give you a free shot or a life-changing business idea.
The Velvet Penguin: For When You’re Too Old for Clubbing but Too Young for Bingo
The Velvet Penguin is where the 25-35 crowd goes to pretend they’re not still in college—and where college students go to pretend they’re not 25. The decor is 70% “I found this on Pinterest in 2012,” and 30% “I’m too broke to buy real art.”
- Why Go? The “Penguin Platter” is a must—three house-made cocktails named after penguin species. The Adelie is a surprise.
- Bar Tip: Ask the bartender if they’ve ever considered growing their business with a custom bar menu. The answer will be either “no” or “I’m thinking about it but I’m too busy crying over my ex’s new haircut.”
The Wandering Koala: For When You’re Lost (in Life or the City)
If you’ve ever driven around Perth for 45 minutes and still ended up at a different suburb, The Wandering Koala gets you. This bar is a sanctuary for those who embrace the chaos. The menu is 80% “I have no idea what this is but it’s $20,” and 20% “I made this last night and it’s still fermenting.”
- Why Go? The “Koala Kombo” is a mystery meat (metaphorically) of three experimental cocktails. You’ll love it, hate it, or question your life choices.
- Bar Tip: Ask for the bar’s history from the owner. It’s a 30-minute story involving a koala plushie and a broken jukebox.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs): Because Google Isn’t Always Right
1. What’s the best time to hit Perth’s bar scene?
Weeknights at 6 PM when the sun is still out and your friends haven’t realized it’s still Monday. Pro tip: Avoid weekends unless you enjoy waiting 45 minutes for a seat and a $100 tab.
2. Any hidden gems?
Check out The Rabbit Hole (yes, it’s a real bar) if you’re feeling adventurous. It’s tucked behind a bookstore and serves drinks in a maze that’s 70% “where is this?” and 30% “I’m drunk and I don’t care.”
3. How do I avoid looking like a tourist?
Don’t ask for “the best cocktail.” Ask for the “least expensive drink that still makes me feel fancy.” Bonus points if you can pronounce the bartender’s name correctly.
Final Cheers: Your Bar Life Just Got a Lot Better
Perth’s bar scene is a wild, wonderful, and occasionally confusing world—and now you’re armed with the knowledge to navigate it like a pro. Whether you’re sipping a “Mystery Shot” at The Drunken Duck or debating the merits of the “Seagull’s Revenge,” these bars are your new best friends. And if you ever need to sell your own beer to the masses, Dropt.beer is your gateway to becoming the next big thing.
Still not sure where to go? Contact us and we’ll help you find your liquid confidence. Cheers!
