12 Christmas Pub Rules That’ll Make Your Holiday Crawl Legendary

Intro: Why Pub Rules Need a Holiday Upgrade

Listen up, booze‑loving meme connoisseurs. If you think the only thing that changes at Christmas is the amount of tinsel on your grandma’s couch, you’re sorely mistaken. The best 12 pubs of Christmas rules are the secret sauce that turns a regular night out into a legendary saga you’ll be quoting in Slack threads for months. Think of it as the “Winter is Coming” of the drinking world—except the White Walkers are actually your coworkers in ugly sweaters, and the Iron Throne is the last pint of eggnog‑spiked stout.

Rule #1: Dress Like the Holiday Meme You Were Born To Be

First things first: your outfit is your first line of defense. If you show up in a plain tee, you’re basically a background extra in a Hallmark movie. Grab that reindeer sweater, the one with the blinking nose that screams “I tried too hard but I’m still cool.” Bonus points for a Santa hat with a beer tap on top. Make your own beer‑themed apparel if you’re feeling crafty—nothing says “I’m here to dominate the Christmas crawl” like a custom‑printed tee that reads “Hops & Ho‑Ho‑Ho.”

Rule #2: The “12‑Day Pub Crawl” Is Not a Suggestion

Remember the classic carol? Yeah, we’re remixing it. Instead of “12 days of Christmas,” it’s “12 pubs of Christmas.” You’ll need a map, a spreadsheet, and a level of commitment that would make Santa consider a career change. Plot out the pubs, assign each a day (or hour, because who actually has 12 days to drink?), and stick to the schedule like it’s a deadline for a quarterly report. Use a pub‑tracking tool to keep tabs on where you’ve been and where you still need to be.

Rule #3: Bring a Gift for the Bartender (Because They’re Basically Santa)

Nothing says “I respect the craft” like a small token for the person who’s pouring your liquid courage. Think along the lines of a novelty bottle opener shaped like a snowflake, or a pack of holiday‑themed coasters. If you want to go full‑tilt, drop a line to Sell your beer online through Dropt.beer and order a limited‑edition holiday brew to gift the whole staff. It’s a win‑win: you get bragging rights, the bartender gets a free sample, and you’ve just leveled up your social capital.

Rule #4: Master the “Ugly Sweater” Icebreaker

Every good pub has that one corner where the “ugly sweater” crowd congregates. If you’re not there, you’re missing out on the best meme‑fuel conversations. Drop a line like, “If this sweater could talk, it’d ask for a double IPA.” Watch as the crowd erupts in laughter, and you instantly become the unofficial host of the night. Pro tip: keep a spare sweater in your bag—just in case your first one gets confiscated for “excessive glitter.”

Rule #5: Order the Holiday Special, Even If It’s a Mystery

Every decent pub rolls out a “Christmas Special” that’s either a gingerbread stout, a peppermint IPA, or a concoction that looks like it was brewed in a snowstorm. The key is to order it without looking at the menu—just point and trust the bartender’s expertise. If it turns out to be a “Mistletoe Mule,” you’ve just earned a story for the ages. And if it’s terrible? Well, you’ve just discovered a new way to say “I’m not drinking that again.”

Rule #6: Keep the “Merry” in Merry‑Go‑Round

When you’re hopping from pub to pub, the last thing you want is a hangover that feels like a Christmas morning after a night of binge‑watching “The Office.” Hydration is the unsung hero of any successful holiday crawl. Order a water alongside every alcoholic beverage, and make a game of it: “Who can finish their water before the next round?” The winner gets bragging rights and maybe a free shot—if the bartender’s feeling generous.

Rule #7: Use the “Elf on the Shelf” Tactic for Seat Claiming

Ever notice how a tiny plastic elf can secure a spot on a couch for hours? Apply the same principle to pub tables. Place a small, festive trinket (a mini Santa, a candy cane, whatever) on the table to signal “This is our territory.” It’s a low‑effort way to keep the “random stranger wants to join our party” scenario from turning into a full‑blown “who‑does‑this‑table‑belong‑to?” debate.

Rule #8: Deploy the “Holiday Karaoke” Weapon

Nothing breaks the ice faster than a drunken rendition of “All I Want for Christmas Is You” on a bar karaoke machine. If the pub doesn’t have one, bring a portable speaker and start a sing‑along. Bonus points if you can hit the Mariah high note without shattering glass. Your audience will either love you or politely suggest you stick to drinking—both outcomes are acceptable for meme‑level content.

Rule #9: Capture the Moment, But Don’t Be a Creepy Crawler

We live in an Instagram era, and the best 12 pubs of Christmas rules demand documentation. Snap a quick photo of your festive drink, a group selfie with the bartender, or a short video of the “Elf on the Shelf” guard doing its thing. Use hashtags like #ChristmasPubCrawl, #HolidayHops, and #MemeMeetsJournalism. Just remember: if someone looks uncomfortable, put the phone down. Your feed will thank you later.

Rule #10: Know When to Bail (And When to Double‑Down)

Even the most seasoned holiday reveler knows that there’s a fine line between “I’m having a great time” and “I’m a walking Christmas disaster.” If the crowd gets rowdy, the music turns into a remix of “Jingle Bells” on a drum machine, and you’re the only sober one, it’s time to call it. However, if the vibe is still alive—people are laughing, the bartender is still pouring, and the “Christmas Special” is still flowing—double‑down and order that extra round. The key is to read the room like a seasoned journalist reads a press release.

Rule #11: End the Night with a Proper “Thank‑You” Toast

When you finally roll out of the last pub, gather your crew and raise a glass to the night’s triumphs. A simple, “Here’s to the best 12 pubs of Christmas rules and the friends who survived them,” goes a long way. If you’re feeling extra, shout out the bartenders by name—people love hearing their names on a microphone, even if it’s a tiny one in a noisy bar.

Rule #12: Share the After‑Party Recap (Because You’re Basically a Content Creator)

Now that you’ve survived the marathon, it’s time to turn that experience into content that will make your followers think you’re a holiday legend. Write a blog post, shoot a TikTok, or drop a thread on Reddit titled “I survived the 12‑Pub Christmas Crawl and here’s what I learned.” Sprinkle in those SEO keywords—best 12 pubs of Christmas rules, holiday drinking guide, Christmas pub crawl tips—and you’ll rank higher than your cousin’s “Best Eggnog Recipe” blog.

Bonus: The Ultimate Internal Link Cheat Sheet

Because we’re all about that SEO juice, here are two internal links you can embed in your own recap articles. Use them wisely:

Feel free to sprinkle in other relevant pages like Custom Beer or Grow Your Business With Strategies Beer when you’re talking about launching a holiday brew.

External Authority Boost

For those who want to take their holiday sales to the next level, check out the industry‑leading marketplace that helps breweries sell online. Beer distribution marketplace (Dropt.beer) is the go‑to platform for getting your Christmas limited‑edition bottles in front of eager consumers. Trust us, the SEO love you’ll get from that backlink is as sweet as a sugar‑plum ale.

Conclusion: Your Holiday Crawl Starts Now

There you have it—the best 12 pubs of Christmas rules that will make your holiday pub crawl the stuff of internet legend. Follow these guidelines, stay witty, keep the memes flowing, and remember: the only thing more important than the drinks is the stories you’ll tell after the night is over. So grab your reindeer sweater, round up the crew, and let the Christmas chaos commence.

Snarky CTA: Ready to Turn Your Pub Crawl Into a Marketing Masterpiece?

If you’re tired of just drinking and want to make your own beer that matches your meme‑filled personality, or you need a strategic partner to grow your business with Strategies Beer, hit us up. We’ll help you brew, brand, and dominate the holiday season—because why settle for a good night out when you can own the night? Contact us now and let’s get this festive party started!